I get caught up grumbling sometimes, in feeling sorry for myself and how much I have on my plate. I watch how well Steve manages to balance his extremely stressful and demanding job with his home life – how he never seems to struggle with being where he is (home at home; work at work). I get all mixed up in my head – sometimes I’m writing emails to my run group thinking about a presentation; sometimes I’m writing a paper thinking abut my kids; sometimes I can’t concentrate on anything.
I had a paper due on Monday that I put off and put off and put off. I was out Friday night at a Spyce party and out Saturday morning at a training session and out Saturday afternoon/night at Steve’s grandfather’s 80th birthday party two hours away and I woke up Sunday morning with a paper to write on a really depressing movie for my psychology class.
Steve scooped the kids up and got them dressed and whipped them out of the house before I was finished brewing a pot of coffee. He took them out to breakfast and then to play on the jungle gym at McDonald’s and then for a bike ride. He gave me over two hours of time in a quiet house to type away on my paper.
They came home, loud through the door, and I closed the laptop and had a cup of coffee with Steve while the kids watched a cartoon. I finished up the paper while everyone napped after lunch. No stress, and we were still able to spend our much treasured evening together.
Later that afternoon, I profusely thanked Steve for taking the kids out of the house. It’s more than that, though. I’ve been so busy, and he’s been here at home, silently holding things together for me. Dishes, kids, pj’s, never ever commenting on the size of our laundry pile. He’s this rock in my life – this pillar of amazing support.
Are you kidding me? he asked, We had an awesome morning! I was happy to have Daddy time with just the girls.
It means so much – it makes all the difference in the world to me, to have him support me.
This fall has seen a lot of changes in our life. From Leila in school to the girls in childcare full time. It’s not always easy, and sometimes, my heart aches with how much I miss them. (And oh. How I miss our home days. More on that another day.) But to know that Steve is here to love me and hug me and clean the kitchen for me? That makes it all possible, I swear.