2011: Recap

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
Raise $7000 for Team Diabetes, run a sub-4:30 marathon, go to therapy, put both kids in daycare full time to be a full time student, go to a strip club, have four articles published in national fitness/running magazines.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

This is what I wrote last year: As for this year, I always make resolutions. There are some physical ones this year (I’m going to run the Ottawa Marathon in May), but the big one is to believe in my own strength. To not let myself forget my own gifts and strength. To ignore my insecurities for long enough that they go away, to believe that I truly am beautiful and wonderful, valuable and irreplaceable. And to start my book. Oh yeah, and to wear clothes that make me feel sexy.

I completed the marathon and didn’t start a book. More importantly than both of those things, yes I did start to believe in my own strength. I still struggle with it and instead of ignoring my insecurities, I ended up facing them head on and attempting to challenge them. Sometimes that worked and sometimes it didn’t. I cried a lot this year, in a really good way, and started to love myself for the first time in a long time. And more because of that than the clothes I wear (less sweatshirts now than before), I feel sexier than I did this time last year.

I am really, really proud of myself for that. I have two resolutions this year: To embrace the mornings (get out of bed when Steve does and get things going instead of grabbing every last second possible under my covers) and to get the girls early from daycare twice a week.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No, but i know SO MANY pregnant ladies right now!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Happily, no.

5. What countries did you visit?
The States in April

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
You know, I worked so hard on loving myself and being a good wife and a good mother and a good athlete this year, that I don’t feel that there was anything I really lacked. I’m not saying every day was perfect, but I know in my heart that I gave my everything to everything I did this past year and so I’m satisfied with the results. If I can keep up that level of effort and enthusiasm through the next year, I’ll be really happy.

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 29 – Ottawa Marathon
Sept 18 – Army Half (I ran a 1:55 race – SO FAST for me)
Jan 13 because that was the day that Steve and I got into the biggest fight we had ever had and the fall-out took months and months to settle.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Happiness.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Hating myself for the first few months of 2011.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Steve had shoulder surgery almost three months ago.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My therapy sessions, probably.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My own. For seeing that I needed to change and taking pro-active measures to do so.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My own. For pushing my marriage to the brink. For hurting and betraying Steve, for the horribly mean things I told myself.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Daycare, mortgage, groceries, evaporated.

15. What did you get really excited about?
The marathon, my coaching gig with Team in Training.

16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
Firework by Katy Perry.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

– happier or sadder? Happier. So. Much. Happier.
– thinner or fatter? Thinner.
– richer or poorer? we have a little more money but not much more disposable income, figure that one out

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Yoga.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

I’m of the mind that things happen because you let them happen and/or they need to happen. So, in that respect, nothing. In reality, I wish I’d been less jealous, less threatened by other women because of something arbitrary like the fact that they have less fat around their waist.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Here with Steve and the girls for the morning and then to my parents for dinner (two hours away) and then to my in-laws from the 26-28 (five hours away). We’ve done that for a few years now and I’ll be honest, it’s starting to get old.

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?
No

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
No.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Classified. I’ve listened to him for a while off and on, but really started to enjoy it this year.

26. What did you want and get?
A strong marriage. I mean, it was always strong, but I really put it to the test this year.

27. What did you want and not get?
A six pack. Hah.

21. What was your favorite TV program?
After everything I’ve said about vampires, I’m kind of embarrassed to admit that it was Tru Blood.

22. What were your favorite books of the year?
I didn’t get that much read this year, but I just started The Happiness Project and it’s really good.

23. What was your favorite music from this year?

I rock the country station. Zac Brown Band in particular.

24. What were your favorite films of the year?
Lars and the Real Girl. It’s not new, but I saw it for the first time and it is so, so good.

25. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
We partied like Rock Stars! I turned 30 and Steve rented a limo bus to take us downtown to a club where we had free drinks and a VIP booth. I danced my ass off with my best friend, who came down from Waterloo. The best part was, it was ALL a huge surprise!

26. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Finally learning how to be ok with myself, with the dust bunnies around my house. Realizing that going for a run can turn the tides of my day from bad to wonderful. A great sex life. Learning that the feeling of my skin crawling was actually anxiety and learning how to control those feelings and figure out what was causing them.

27. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
Better than the year before, less jogging pants and sweatshirts, but still mostly jeans and shirts.

28. What kept you sane?
Therapy (literally), running, working out, Steve.

29. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
RDJ, as always. I kind of also have a crush on Jimmy Fallon.

30. What political issue stirred you the most?
A few municipal issues.

31. Who did you miss?
My brothers, because they live so very far away.

32. Who was the best new person you met?
I don’t think I met anyone new this year, actually.

33. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.
“We are all meant to shine, as children do.”

Around March (I think?) I had this realization and it changed the tide of my life. I looked at my children, who I truly believe have been sent to this earth by God as angels. And I know that my children are not the only angels on this earth, but that everyone’s child is. And we were all children once. The way I love my children is the way my parents love me, and so if they were sent here to open my heart to the possibility of love, than I must have been sent here to open my parents’ hearts to love and then so everyone must be here on this earth because of love. And so we are all made of love and wonder and if I am made from God’s love, what right do I have to treat myself badly or say mean things to myself? If I am made from God’s love and am God’s gift to this earth (in the same way that we are all God’s gifts to this earth), than it is my responsibility to treat that gift right. It’s my responsibility to take care of my body, yes, but also my spirit. And so I started to take care of my spirit. And I swear that made all the difference.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Let’s go with a quote instead: Yours is the energy that makes your world. There are no limitations to the self except those you believe in. ~Jane Roberts

29. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.

That I am worthy of love. That I can love myself. That I am smart and talented and gifted.

(Check out 2010 and 2009 if you’re interested.)

(Feel free to link your own in the comments so I can go read!)

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